1) Who likes a Debbie Downer?

2) What I would like to complain about could be read by someone and get me in trouble, especially when it pertains to my job

However, this week, apart from The Stellar Boss (aka Dad) and the fact that we think alike, this week at work has been H-E-double hockey sticks. My other boss who shall remain nickname-less... well, he sucks. That's the best way to explain it. And I know I have a great job, great benefits, so much future potential and oddly while I was in Houston I discovered I'm much more passionate about our little family business than I thought so I doubt I'll leave.

But on weeks like this I dream of the jobs I wish I had. Here they are:

• Full-time Nanny. I don't care if it's for a famous baseball player or for my favorite kid (Little Man). I love kids, I love the jobs involved with it, I love being a nanny.
• Wedding Planner. Seriously. I know that being a bridesmaid seven times doesn't qualify you to plan weddings, but I've learned a lot. And apart from the day you have a kid, it seems this is the right up there in the top five best days of your life so aside from the bridezillas and stress, it would be great to have a job revolving around love.
• Dog Shelter Owner. It would probably have to be a dog shelter farm or something as I would never, ever put a dog to sleep but as much as I love kids, I love dogs too. They deserve love, nurturing, a comfy couch and a good home.
• Cruise Ship Director. It's the event planner in me. I don't see anything wrong with being on a boat, with the ocean surrounding you, traveling from one palm tree filled destination to the next. Maybe the small quarters and constant boat rocking, but I could handle that.
• Personal Shopper. Combining two interests: clothes + people. Enough said.
• My reach dream job: Press Secretary for the White House. When I was hooked on The West Wing, I envied Alison Janney. I wanted to be her.
• My reach dream job #2: lobbyist for a non-profit group serving children.
• Date planner/matchmaker. While there are a fair amount of dating services, they don't tell you what do after you get the date. Where to go, what to do, appropriate attire, presents (if applicable) and etc. I have assisted many of my guy friends in planning dates going so far as to make the reservations for them mostly because they are clueless.

I suppose that if I decide to jump ship, several of those jobs are within my reach. I guess it's all about taking a leap of faith and going for it...

What would you do if you could have any job you wanted?

There was one blogworthy thing from our weekend escape that I have to share, since it involves P2 writing yet another fabulous note (less bossy than this one and more friendly than this one, though.)  Along with presents and a card, P2 decided that he needed to write AD a birthday note to open at her party as well. Sorry I can't include a pic like I have before, so you can see his fabulous handwriting, but I don't have it to scan (AD's Mama whisked it away for safekeeping forever [she's really organized that way {damn her, it's probably laminated by now}])  However, I do remember what it said:

"Dear [AD],
Happy Birthday. I hope you have a good party and have fun opening your presents.
Love, [P2] & [P3] & MY MOM"

I can't decide what's better: that he hoped she'd have a great party (as if he wouldn't be there himself)....or that I got billed as "My Mom."
------------------
Enough about our weekend! In other news, we're into week 3 with the nanny and life is still divine. SO divine, in fact, that I think the summer of 2008 will probably, in future, be described in time as A.C. (Aestivi Custodis).  Seriously, life is good.  Check it out:
*(This is probably tempting the fates to say, but) I haven't drenched myself with coffee in the car in the morning in almost 3 weeks.

*Incentivizing (the nanny [yep, I offered her a bonus if she could teach P2]) has increased shoe-tying autonomy in our house by 50%. P2 can tie his own shoes now, and I'm damn near giddy about what this means for the coming school year, because even after the nanny goes back home, THIS STAYS :)

*(This has nothing to do with the goat nanny being here,but): My fruit cup at lunch today was perfectly proportioned. Yep, NO. HONEYDEW. AT. ALL. Woo Hoo!

*(Another non-nanny-related item that still falls under the "How Life is Good" column): Over lunch today, I got to see Barack Obama's speech in Berlin live on CNN.  I actually got goosebumps.  It was so exciting to hear an intelligent, articulate speaker and know that he could possibly be the next POTUS.... I'm way tired of cringing every time the current Prez opens his mouth.  Thank heaven for the 22nd Amendment, huh?  T minus 179 days, people!

*(In other "Life is Good" countdown news): T minus 63 days until the "Grey's Anatomy" season premiere, T minus 54 days until the "House" season premiere, and T minus 27 days until my Graduate Assistantship starts. (What? I didn't tell you? Oops. Sorry. Got myself that umbrella, after all. And the one I really wanted, too! Beginning this fall term, I will be a Graduate Assistant for the Public Administration department. [Can I get an "Amen"? Oh, come on, surely you can spare one. If only because now I will stop with the whinging, right?])

That's it, that's all I have.  I think we're all caught up now!

That sets the scene.  I go downstairs for some time to myself since the other adults were home to watch the movie with my charge.  From my room, I can hear them all upstairs laughing about the movie.  I went to bed thinking that I've just scored in the whole "Super Nanny" gig.

This morning I get a call from my boss while I'm waiting for my sixteen-year-old charge to finish her ice skating session.  Apparently, the twelve-year-old had some major issues with Clue, and was so scared by it that he couldn't sleep, and when he did finally get to sleep, he had nightmares.  This is a PG movie from the '80s, people.  Today, he's in a foul mood from lack of sleep, and he refuses to go try to take a nap.  Hey, the kid's gonna be thirteen next month, I can't really force him to sleep.  

Here's the issue: he wants me to take him to see Dark Knight.  His dad is completely ok with letting me do this.  I'm not.  It's not that I don't want to see the movie (I really, really, really do....) it's just that he had nightmares over a movie that was soooo not your typical nightmare-inducing movie.  He's a bear today.  How in the world am I going to take him to see a movie that is dark and a bit twisted with a guy in smudged clown make-up?  (I have nothing against the late Heath Ledger... he still makes my heart go "pitter patter" even to this day.)  I know that the whole reason he wants to see it is because his older sisters and his soon-to-be older step-sister and same aged step-brother have all seen it and love it.  Kids all grow at different stages... I don't know what to do here.  When is it okay for the nanny to put her foot down and say to the parent, "Hey, your kid shouldn't do this.  It will really screw him up."?

Overcasty day today. RIGHT ON! *rolleyes* I have never been so sick of clouds and rain in my life. That's saying a lot because I love to sit out under the porch during a rainstorm to hear the rain and watch the lightning.

Z is finally down for his nap at 11:30 am. Which is over an hour past his normal time. Getting K's lunch ready and soon it will hopefully be his nap time as well.

Going for the travel vaccines for Africa trip today.

I still don't know if I want to go for sure or not. I have been wanting to go to Africa for so long that it's hard to say, No I am not going, when that's exactly how I feel. I have no idea when a chance like this will occur again.

Been catching up on Anthony Bourdain No Reservations episodes on Youtube. Forgotten how much I love his show. 

Guess I need to quit avoiding the day sort of speak and get my arse in gear!

So the phone mess. I get up today to get the doorbell cause the delivery guys like to play what is it ding dong ditch or something? so I answer the door, its a package obviously cause all I can hear is a big truck speeding off. Its a new phone! what? I already have a phone. so instead of telling whats wrong with my phone its automatically defective and I get a new one. I turn on my phone to call them and it doesn't work. I panicked cause I'm without a phone. Not a one. Not a house phone or a cell phone in Houston. Good thing I had gas in my car. So I take both phones after putting in the SIM card, battery and charging the new one and head down to the closest gas station not even a two minute drive away. I'm on the pay phone, get the phone activated and the guy says he'll transfer my cell phone number and my minutes. I get home call mom to talk to her and no she says she almost didn't answer cause its a 713 number a houston number. not what i wanted. I go back and call and it takes about an hour yeah an hour for them to tell me that it will take almost a week for me to get a new sim card which will get me back my old number. I'm thinking I'll keep this one. Too much mess to go through. Now all i need to do is call them and cancel that order. I was going to do it earlier but forgot.

(source www.67.com 23 July 2008)

Endless amounts of hugs & kisses from the kiddos

Sounds of laughter in the air

Don't have to wear make up

Watching Z fall asleep. There's this flurry of action then the eyes start closing followed by his gentle snore. He's 9 mos old and snores already. HAHA!

The state of my afro of curls doesn't matter. Currently looking very messy & big

K's giggle from figuring out how to work the tickle me elmo. He loves it!

Being able to listen to music all day long. Though I make sure the music I listen to when kids are around is kid friendly, don't want anyone learning foul language on my watch. ;)

Working on trying to be more positive. I got way down into a serious depressed funk recently. Don't like it when I am that way.

Looking forward to see my sister and her family in Sept if that is indeed when I head out. Haven't quite bought the tix yet nor have I told them that's when my last day is. Then still trying to figure out what I want to do about the Africa trip.

Other downside to leaving in Sept, I won't be seeing Emmylou Harris or Joan Baez in concert.

Speaking of concerts, Coldplay is coming to Dublin on Dec 21st. DOH! Guess there is no coldplay show for me this tour. I am however excited at the chance that I could be seeing Ellis Paul sometime in Nov because he's doing a couple of shows in CA and I should be there by then. *bounces*

A little background information is going to be helpful before reading this.  I am a member of Liquid Church in Morristown, New Jersey.  If you are not one of the thousands who either attends weekly services live or via web cast, then you should know that Liquid is a Bible-based non-denominational church that is highly focused on being creative, contemporary, and relevant to daily life. This summer we are focusing primarily on being "Glocal", that is a local church with a global influence.  Part of that mission has us partnering up with charity: water.  (There are links at the bottom of this post to connect you to more information about Liquid as well as charity: water).  As a member of the church, I saw a great opportunity for nannies in the area to get together "just for fun" a couple times a month, to help us network and support each other, as most of us call home anywhere but New Jersey.  If you are an area nanny or au pair, we are here for you... you don't even need to be a member of the church.  My main focus is on relating with people.  So, that being said, here is my "Facebook blog entry."  Enjoy.

We, as professional child-care providers, are blessed enough to be able to watch "our kids" grow up in healthy and prosperous environments. Can you imagine "your kid" hiking for hours every day in search of water, that oftentimes comes from a muddy, urine and feces infested puddle miles from a home that cannot afford the charcoal needed to boil it before consumption? The water they are forced to drink for "survival" is teaming with so many bacteria that sickness, disease, and ultimately death, are an every day reality in the lives of 1.1 billion people throughout the world.

What can we, as nannies & au pairs, do to help these children? The answer is simple... and the answer is charity: water. Charity: water is a non-for-profit organization who's mission is to provide the funds, equipment, and training necessary for the world's poorest citizens to build and maintain the water wells so desperately needed to not only sustain their lives, but enable their future generations to grow and prosper. Each well costs $5000 to build, and supports a village of 400 for 20 years.

On July 26, 2008, the Nannies & Au Pairs Club (supported by Liquid Church) will be hosting a fun walk through Jockey Hollow Park in Morristown, New Jersey to raise money to contribute to the building of a well through charity: water. 100% of funds raised through this event will go directly to charity: water. The goal is to be able to raise enough money to average each of us contributing $10 per child we care for. The fun walk will cover approximately 4 miles of mostly flat terrain.

Please come out for this amazing event that will only lead to the betterment of lives that so desperately need help. Together we can truly make a huge difference to these children and families. If you would like to give, but are unable to come out (distance, prior commitments...) please let me know, and I will be happy to give you information about how and where to contribute.

For more information about charity: water, please go to http://www.charitywater.org

For more information about Liquid Church, please go to http://www.liquidchurch.com

For more information about Jockey Hollow Park, please go tohttp://www.purdes.com/njhiking/jockey_hollow/index.html andhttp://www.nps.gov/archive/morr/morr1.htm

Then at 4 months, I decided to get a babysitter. We lived in a reallllly small town at the time (I mean, shooting whistle pigs was the officical town pastime), and the local mom's group had about 5 people. Of those five, one of the moms said she'd love to babysit for Nicholas. She did that twice before I arrived at her door a little earlier than announced one day, to pick him up, and found him sitting in a diaper full of poop, in front of the TV. I vowed to myself that I would never again get a sitter! MGS was in full gear.

At 6 months, I wanted to get a job (again). However, by this time I was 3 months pregnant and I realized that probably no one would hire me. I decided to resign myself to a grim fate of changing diapers, picking up toys, feeding Nick, and rinse and repeat, for 8 hours a day, everyday. That was when it hit me - that there had to be reliable sitters out there... right? I mean, I refused to believe that all the sitters out there would let my infant watch daytime soaps while they talked on the phone to their long-lost cousin in Arkansas. The only question was, how do I find said sitter? Thus began my Yahoo! search. And the answer was simple... I needed a nanny agency.

We are now the proud members of Sweet Peas Nanny Agency. This agency, as most nanny agencies, does all the work for you. They recruit highly qualified sitters and nannies (part- and full-time), check references, conduct background checks, and compose profiles on their sitters and nannies. You can see what education your sitter or nanny has, how he/she plans to entertain your child, and how he/she defines him or herself as a person. As a member family, you can list your preferences for a nanny - what personality characteristics you would like your nanny or sitter to have, what experience, what chores he or she would have to do, how many hours you need a nanny or sitter per week, etc. etc. You can be as picky or as lenient as you like. Sweet Peas Nannies even sent us a "babysitting log" that the sitter has to fill out while she's here. Basically, it lets you see how she spent each hour with your child. Sweet Peas also has a program called Learning Through Play, and each of their nannies and sitters are trained in this technique of child interaction. They teach the sitter/nanny that interacting one-on-one with a child is the best thing for the child (for stimulation and safety), which I feel, is a great philosophy.

This service cost us $50 (membership fee), and everytime we get our sittter to come over, we have to pay a $10 placement fee, plus the sitter's hourly wage. If you get really comfortable with a sitter, and want your children to have the same sitter everytime, you can "Go Direct", which means the agency will provide you the sitter's contact information so that you can bypass the middle man and just call the sitter whenever you need him or her.

Almost every decently-sized city in the U.S. has a nanny agency. You can call the BBB and your state's Attorney General's office to make sure their record is squeaky clean. We did, because we are extremely picky and didn't want a repeat of what I call "Dirty Diaper Sitter Situation".

Here at Pretty, Witty and Functional, my aim is to provide you with hints, tips and products that will either (a) make your life as a mom easier, (b) provide you with some really pretty things or (c) both of the above. I hope this post has helped with (a), and with easing some of that MGS. Knowing your child is well taken care of so you can go out and pursue whatever it is that you want to pursue is so empowering. Tonight, the husband and I are going out to dinner and a movie to celebrate our 6th anniversary - freedom is a wonderful thing!

I'm thinking I may just do focus groups for a while and plasma donation. How fun an lucrative does that sound? haha.
I found something today that I can do for a while but I doubt I will put myself through the stress of trying to get this done. Theres a job where you take pictures of apartments. You get 12.50 per property and 3 bucks more for pics of the pool. I can remember how many apts need to be photographed but it worked out to be around 240 or so dollars. not worth it but it was good to look into it. Who knows what will happen with that though.

I just wanted to share the good news.
I can breathe now!!

Ugh! Someone tell me what to do.

Other newsage:

Z has a cold. Poor baby! He is absolutely miserable but laughing at the same time. What a sight. Snot is flying everywhere, but he's hanging in there.

K is a whiner. Think he's doing a little reverting back to a younger age because of his brother and the attention his brother gets.

Just saw the lineup for this year's ACL. DAMN! Lots of people I would love to see this year: Swell Season, Shooter Jennings, Robert Earl Keen, Gillian Welch, Patti Griffin, Old '97s, Rodney Crowell, Mates Of State, and the list goes on & on. There's no way I can buy a plane tix back to CA then try to buy a tix for later in Sept out to Austin, never mind where would I stay...not a chance in hell of staying at the hostel I  dared to stay in the last time I was there.

Ever the music lover with no money to back it up. *laughs* Least I can dream right? *day dreams* Why did I have to choose music to be passionate about?

• Nanny Pants (coined by her foster family),
• which became Nanny,
• then Jane granted her a middle name, so now her full name is: Nanette Rose Bergman;
• Nanner Bananner;
• and THEN tonight we gave her an alter-ego, Nanette Pantalons, a bored French poet who just published her first volume of short-form existentialist poetry. Highlights include, "La Caisse de la Morte: Huis Clos (The Stifling Crate: No Exit)", "Chants de Petit Gateau (Ode to A Biscuit)", "Le Chat Mon Amour (My Love, the Cat), and excerpted from her forthcoming English volume, "Heavenly Scents Along the Grass";
• if it's right before bath time, she's Stinky;
• Ooooooooooooh! Who lives in a pineapple under the bush? NAN-NY SQUARE-PANTS! Pinkish and white with a beautiful tush! NAN-NY SQUARE-PANTS!
• And last but not least: Superdog!

Dave's Nannery's Cave Nannery sounds incredible! I love it
regards
Maria B, owner

It's good to know that I'm not the only person with a high opinion of my genius business sense.

Physically- joints hurting, back is in knots, not sleeping much and not eating a whole lot.

Emotionally- just drained. I am a sensitive person but now it's more so then ever before

Mentally- not able to concentrate well

Depending on how things go for them getting a replacement I could be leaving anytime between now and Xmas holidays. The plan if I leave for Xmas is just not to come back.

Still trying to figure out if I want to go to Nigeria and Spain with them. 

Then there is the whole thing that I would love to go to Scotland and Netherlands before heading back over.

I just know it was the right decision made because I am truly smiling today, got almost 8 hrs sleep last night instead of the 4 I have been pulling, and my back isn't bugging me as much.

Sedan så kommer Mary Poppins och jag måste säga att hon hade inte klarat sig länge hos de krävande mammorna i Marin, här räcker det inte med att man kan trolla, flyga med paraply och att barnen gillar en. Nänä. Det hade inte gått. Här kommer plus och minuslista (sån ska man göra när man intervjuar, speciellt med nannies.)

Plus: Mary Poppins var tydlig, trevlig, barnen älskade henne, hon kunde trolla och flyga med sitt paraply, hon fick dem att städa sitt rum på nolltid och hon fick dem att somna efter en kort godnattsång (wow, det är verkligen trolleri).

Minus: Hon kunde trolla och flyga med sitt paraply (kanske inte så lämpligt). Hon umgicks med Bert, dvs hennes "pojkvän" när hon var med barnen. Sånt tolereras inte av dagens föräldrar. Men det värsta av allt, hon slutade snabbt. Det går verkligen fetbort. Finns inget jobbigare än att hitta en bra nanny, men då måste de verkligen hålla sig kvar ett tag när man äntligen lyckats hitta någon som fungerar.

Jag kommer ihåg innan jag hade barn hur patetiska jag tyckte mina väninnor var som klagade över sina au-pair-flickor. Nu förstår jag dem precis. Och ändå har jag haft tur. Just nu har vi en fantastisk barnflicka, en riktig Mary Poppins, hon kan inte trolla, men hon är gammal simlärare, det slår nästan högre i norra Kalifornien där alla skickar sina barn till simskola vid tre års ålder. Hon gillar barnen och de gillar henne. Hon är aktiv, åker på utflykter och till poolen förstås, och så är hemmet städat som ett trolleri varje dag när vi kommer hem.

Men nu i höst måste vi hitta någon som bara vill jobba några timmar på eftermiddagen varje dag. Hittills har vi fått två lovande svar, och två tveksamma: en som verkade avgjort strulig eftersom hon redan vid första telefonsamtalet avsöjade att hon inte gillade familjen hon precis hade börjat hos och gärna ville byta. (Inte bra, då undrar jag ju direkt hur länge hon ska stanna hos oss. ) Hon ville i alla fall komma på intervju, men sedan ringde hon och berättade att hennes pojkvän bokat en månads resa åt henne och honom till Italien, och dit ville hon ju gärna. Det kan man ju förstå, men jag var ju inte så pigg på att hon jobbade hos oss i två veckor och sedan åkte bort en månad. Så det fick vara.

Sedan ringde en till och lämnade ett meddelande helt på spanska, vilket jag i och för sig förstod, men som förvånade mig lite. Hur kunde hon vara så säker på att jag skulle förstå det? Och två språk får räcka för barnen just nu, även om spanska onekligen är ett världsspråk.  Nä, man blir trött av mindre.

 Men nu håller jag tummarna på att någon av de andra två verkar bra, eller på att Mary Poppins, den riktiga kommer nedflygande från skyn.

So I thought, What's the harm? I'm only going to the store and back. She'll be fine on her own for an hour or so.

I should have known better. Nanny lulled me into a false sense of security today. She was the perfect companion, keeping me company in the office all day while Jane's up visiting Sophie at camp.

But when I walked in the door, groceries in hand, I immediately realized my mistake. Nanny managed to pull down the window blind nearest the door. It was shredded. Bloodied. And the contents of my messenger bag were strewn everywhere.

Then I walked into the dining room. She chewed a small bit out of the kitchen door, but nothing too bad. And there was an odor, but I couldn't place it...

I knew not to show her any affection, and didn't. But I had to see if she was hurt and try to clean some of the blood off her paws and face (it wasn't much, but still an alarming reminder of a pit bull's high tolerance for pain). I didn't speak to her, didn't pet her.

Then I cleaned up the remnants of the blinds. I nearly cried when I saw the bloodied cord and slats. She must have worked very hard trying to get to me, wherever her little doggie mind thought I was.

After putting the groceries away, I decided to help Nanny calm down by taking her for a long walk. When I realized that she hadn't pooped or peed along the way, it suddenly dawned on me what that smell in the dinging room was.

Sure enough, when we got home I inspected the dining room and there it was. A puddle and a pile. Cursing myself under my breath, I cleaned up and tried to think of what I'll tell Jane when she gets home.

One thing's for sure: I won't be doing that again.

Update: Just discovered more evidence of Nanny's tantrum. Wow.

We went for a ride in the car.

Explored our local pet store.

And had a bath. Now I'm pretty convinced that Nanny can tolerate anything without complaint.

Then we visited our friends Amy, Jay, Lilja and Theo! But I don't have pictures to post yet because I *gasp* left my camera at their house! Which I promise you I've never ever done before because my camera is practically glued to me at all times. But if I did have the pictures, you would see how awesome Nanny was around the kids. Nine-month-old Theo was especially fascinated by her, reaching his very curious hands out to her without any fear. Nanny was gentle as can be. Lilja worked up the courage to give Nanny a biscuit, which she accepted with her usual caution. And Nanny benefited from an errant falafel which made it's way to where she was hanging out under the table.

When we got home, Nanner Bananner passed out on the couch. That was most activity she's seen since she came home with us. I loved seeing her interact with kids and other animals (though I'm sure Izzy the cat would have a few things to say about having a dog in her midst).

Other bins are marked:  Kitchen, Windows/Walls, General Cleaning, Fabric Cleaning, Floors, Dusting

I wouldn't recommend that everyone organize their cleaning supplies this way but for those of us that have multiple people working on the same room it is a good option. Hope that helps!

My friend Jeanne commented recently,

this dog isn't a dog, I'm coming to realize. it's a person in a dog's body. There's no other explanation for how soulful she is.

It's true. Nanny's deep, brown eyes are as soulful as they come. There's something behind them that draws you to her, and makes you want to protect her from every bad thing in the universe. Something that says, I'm damaged, and I know you're damaged, too.

Perhaps that's why Jane knew we had to bring her home. Because Nanny needs healing, she appeals to the part of us within ourselves that needs healing also. Her insecurity and cautious nature with strangers resonates with those feelings within myself. I can't speak for Jane, but I'm sure she would say the same.

The other night, I turned to Jane and said, "I'm so glad we did this. Together." Because truth be told, I left the first meeting with Nanny unsure that we should take on a "special needs" dog. I've since come to understand that this was the dog we were supposed to have all along. Because Nanny challenges my notion of what "normal" means (as if I hadn't had enough of those lessons in my life to get that point already), and makes me understand that "not normal" is ok.

Beautiful, in fact.