If the traditional definition of marriage is the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law, when was the union of two people, of the same sex, added to this definition?  It doesn't make any sense to me.

I can think of 2 people in my family involved in this kind of activity, but it's not something I condone.  I was taught growing up in the "church" that marriage was a privilege a man and a woman held that cemented their promise of obligation toward each other.  It's like two pieces of a puzzle that just fit.  I am of that generation where everyone decided to "come out."  I don't want to see all that!  It's a sickness to me and I would prefer we were still in my grandparent's day where you just stayed in the closet.  Way back in the darkest part of the closet.  We were meant to procreate.  It's the natural order of things.

That's why it's very important that a child is either raised by both parents, or surrounded by caring adults, male and female.  It's not normal for a male child to be influenced by his mother alone.  I was a single parent, but made sure my sons were influenced by my brothers, uncles, father and cousins.  I can't teach a boy to be a man.  Only a man can.

He's getting a little to damned comfortable in this relationship. Meaning his true form is showing. Its not like it was that much covered but shit I didn't notice before; I'm catching on to. He got one more time to whatever me and I'm going to snap. He contradicts the fuck out of himself. He ask a question then when he gets an answer he didn't/don't want to hear he says whatever like he shouldn't of asked or didn't want to know in the first damned place. I've never been angry at any of my significant others every other damned day. Like I said in my other blog, this relationship is more stress than its worth. Day after day I'm finding less and less things thats keeping me around. I'm just waiting on that last leaf to make its way to the ground. That last straw, that last drop; that last breath. I don't know if I would snap or just leave. Its come down to the point it wouldn't even be a point in me even getting angry or even saying anything when it doesn't mean squat TO him.

He in a minute is gone have his basketball friends, his best friend, his myspace friends, his CS friends and Y! friends but the girlfriend; is going to be gone. She might go back on her promise and not even be his friend. She might go back on her word and leave him. She just damned well might go back on everything she vowed not to do for the sake of her blood pressure.

Its like he think cause he has the title "boyfriend" he gets special treatments and shit. I mean yea the little shit but some shit he just makes me want to release all my anger out and clothesline the shit out of him. He don't realize I can get angry enough to toss his ass. I don't never remember much or know where the strength come from but someone usually gets hurt when I'm that angry. I hate bottling shit up, I hate repeating myself, I hate going through this shit over and over, I'm almost hate caring cause all it looks like to me is him getting a free ride. Well since he like living in filth; he like the way his home looked before I came around. Well thats how its gone be. I'm not gone pick up after him at all. I'm going to let him be on his daily scheduled routine; like I'm not around or something. I'm going to act invisible most of the time. This living arrangement is only temporary.

SOON as I get me a damn job and a damned good one I WILL be looking for me a place ASAP. & No he can't move in or come dirty up my place either. MAN it ain't even about his capabilities of cleaning or the fact his house if I wasn't there wouldn't get/be cleaned. Its the fact he takes advantage of shit.

You know, I'm very random with my blogs, I jump from one topic to another but still is understood ROYALLY. Anyway, this medicine that I'm taking; causes mood swings. But this is NO mood swing. These are bottled feelings that can't but want to escape, want to be heard, want to be seen, want to be acknowledged. But the man that is the main reason to all the madness is so blind, to the fact that he doesn't realize he's blind. He think its easy talking to him, he think its easy discussing shit to him. Everything is one sided cause he got this facade that he has all the answers. I hate that about him. He don't have all the answers. He don't know half of which he speak. When I cook, he has a problem with that. That irks the FUCK out of me when someone tell me what to do in the damned kitchen. I'm not kitchen illiterate. I know my way around. Let me move around that bitch to the best of my abilities. Don't tell me what to put in a pan. Let me do this. You wasn't in the kitchen when I started don't try to be in there when I damned there finished. When I do eat, he has a problem with that. He says I play around with my food; I've never done that a day in my life. He says I never eat. No you aren't around me every single moment. The 3-day weekend he was gone, I ate at least 50-60 times. I kept going back and back and forth to the store and to the fridge. I couldn't stop eating and I haven't taken my medicine yet. So he thinks he knows me, he thinks he knows my habits. When he only knows what he see's. Nothing that happens repeatedly, just that one time and he knows right away I do it all the time. Get that bullshit out of here Ced. We have NOT ONCE sat down and told each other our dreams, or even told where and how we grew up face to face.

Haven't even told you how I got so talented besides looking and shit and being stuck in the house when I was younger. Yea the shit I wrote you but the things you say and do to be is very obvious that you read it with your mind and eyes closed. Maybe you read it but shit you didn't remember half the shit that was said cause you didn't read it. I hate wasting my time thinking I'm going to get through that person only to be let down in the end. I give my all and that isn't enough. I knew I should of just stay with my girlfriend. We was cool man but we grew a part after high-school and shit. I would love to just turn back the tables and not even deal with the things that come with a penis. Some no MOST of y'all men of today that sit and chat with face-less people on the net day in day out is forgetting that it's going to be a day where someone is going to care and be there for you, but y'all just gone push them away cause you let that e-life rub off on you and thats all the hell you know. Half the time the e-life you're living is fake and you just so happened to start believing the shit and start acting it out in real life. Whether its calling females bitches or just not being themselves all together.

Another thing, I've talked to my ex about all the nudity on this computer I'm using; which is my boyfriends. She told me that even if she was a nigga she would have the respect to make that shit disappear. Thats disgusting and rude as fuck to even have that shit right in your face and its also a sign of cheating and worse things to come/happen. Either that person got a problem or he just don't give a damn about you and think them bitches he'll never fuck is more worthwhile than the one thats actually putting up with his bullshit and being there for him. She told me to let him keep e-fucking them face-less bitches miles and miles away. He gone look up and thats all the hell he gone have.

My ex-girl is just as real as me but unlike her when she speak people actually try to better themselves for good. Not for no damn week like my boyfriend but for life.

He is great to be around don't get me wrong there are some good qualities about him. Or I wouldn't be sticking around. I'm a sucker for love but I ain't no damn fool. Its not even about the sex; its pretty obvious I don't need it in my life. I mean I get the occasional horny-ness but who doesn't? Anyway, if it were more good qualities to out-weigh the bad qualities, I would be back in love with him but sadly, I'm out of it. I just love him. I'm not in love with him no more. That flame blew out a yr ago. Its sad its going to be 3 yrs and I know less about him than I did 2 yrs ago. People say if you fall out of love, you were never in love to begin with. People fall out of love like a chronic depressed person stops doing things they loved the most.

Also its like he hiding something. My gut is always right and my heart, every time I think about it; it starts beating fast. So yea he's hiding something and its bad but he says he not hiding anything but I'm rarely paranoid. I'm rarely not on the money. I be right on the money. & If he don't just come out with it, this relationship won't make it to this November and maybe not even that long. My heart is already telling me to throw in the towel on this relationship. Its not anything major that he's doing thats causing me to want to break up. Its the same little shit that keeps getting to me.

I know what I like in a man when it comes to a relationship. Just not with him, I don't know whats keeping me around, I don't know why I'm bothering myself with him. Not only does my heart tells me about the bad but it has a good side too. I think about down the road I guess. I guess that keeps the relationship going. Plus I can just sit and think about certain things he does or say and I just burst out laughing; damned there in tears.

Its very simple in fact; keeping me happy that is. Just make me laugh and do things with me. Its probably my last relationship, I go so much attention from that abomination. I kind of want that back. The attention my boyfriend gives me half the time isn't something I want. Usually I end up bruised and or in a choke hold from him wrestling with my ass. I guess beggars can't be choosers. I'll get the attention anyway I can I guess.

if i had a dollar for all of the times I thought I'd found the right one
I'dbe a billionaire
i could probably ride out and go and buy me one
i wouldn't mind a dude
that could take my attitude
and take the time to listen
someone that understands when i need a little space
and when i need attention. All you got to do is come around.

-N-

This nigga's actions speak so much louder than words. Its not like he don't know shit. Its not like keep the nigga in the dark about shit. He don't care. He'll get all gussied up to go to some funky ass comedy show but when we go out he just wash under his arms and put on something that he had on that following day or just say he ready. I mean even though we are just going to the movies. At least care enough about your appearance. I mean shit when I leave from here it look like I'm going some where important and all I'm doing is to go see him and to just sit in the apartment the whole day playing video games.

I was sitting at the bus stop thinking about so much shit it almost brung tears to my eyes. I'm sick of blogging this shit out. If he didn't make it feel like telling him would be a waste of his time listening maybe I would tell him. If he didn't make me feel like my feelings are something not getting so worked up over then maybe I would have enough courage to tell him about himself.

He makes me so damned angry. I never gotten this angry over anyone I've ever been with. This relationship is truly not meant to be. I pictured me telling him to his face that I can't do it any more and that I'm not in love with him any more and just breaking into tears. I never almost cried or gotten this angry over any relationship. EVER.

Being there more often and around him made me see the person for who he really is. Yea yea he tries and what not but it don't last. It only last when I say something and if I keep saying something. But no he don't do it cause it hurts me, he only do it to fill the void. Yea he don't shit to call his own, no money, nothing to show for what he went to school for but I loved him anyway for the personality I thought I knew but I don't any more. I don't know who the fuck he is at all. I thought I didn't know him before; well its beyond that. I never felt so much anger when I half-look at him.

He don't compliment me or nothing, we don't converse like adults. We don't connect. Only on a lets call each other names and bash each other level. Not on an serious level, that shit don't exist. If I was to say that to him, he would say either I would get mad or why don't I say these things? It wouldn't matter because he already got it set in his mind that he know me. Actually telling him the reasons why would fly right over his short ass. I don't get angry all the time.

Lately though, he hasn't been considering nothing of me. This feeling of neglect has a strong hold on me and yes he has been neglecting me this past week and this week.  I only see him so often now. Whats fucked up, I'M THERE! Not over here, but there. He'll stay in the same room with me for five damned seconds but his love of his life, that sad, abuse, poor excuse for a computer beckons him every single minute that he's around. I try to think of things to keep my mind occupied and what not, I try to do things to keep me from getting angry. I try so hard but I can't deny the fact that this relationship is for the birds.

I put my all in the relationships I get in. Even when I have my doubts. i try helping out the best way I can. I try. He don't realize what he has in front of him. He don't care, he only trying to get in where he fit in. With his small ass, thats every where. I can't win, at all. Its either say something and get told you're wrong in all types of ways but one. Or not say anything and feel worse than if you open your mouth. I'm not the one to give up on things like this. Like he say I give up to easily. No the hell I don't, I'm just sick of fighting for affection, attention, love. Cause he say it but I seriously don't believe it. When I hear it, I hear, I hate you, I hurt you, I don't love you. When I read it, its as blank as my face right now. The spark that once was in love with this nigga is gone. I don't even know if I just love him not. I would have to sit and think about that.

He never even told me why he love me or even like me around. I shake my head cause I'm realizing so much shit its sickening. I'm tired, the more I think the more I so ready to give up & now that I've thought about it for the last two weeks or so. Its time to completely forget about him.

---

Let me straighten one thing out with the situation of you asking me to go out. Two times you've asked me to go out and I'm not counting the times you invited me to your church. The movies? Remember that Adam, I see you don't. Two times you asked me and suggested that we go see a movie. Two times you called and told me you couldn't do it cause you had things to do. Two times you called and told me we would have to do it another time. So to sit here and throw that bullshit at me was pathetic. Your attempt to finally "confront" me is failing miserably. Anyway...

---

I don't like taking or receiving gifts. Thats just how I am. You get offended of it, thats not my problem Adam. As a person you are suppose to respect that, you're suppose to realize maybe I was raised different. Being that you're a Church-goer I thought you would understand that, but its pretty obvious that you don't. No one over this way never said that you've asked me or took a lot from me. You're acting as if I stabbed you in your eyes and you can no longer see that you've hurt yourself and caused these dilemma's in your life.

---

I don't care about you thinking of what you thought I was. Things like that you supposed to know. Well; maybe I know how to read people better than you, but I knew who you were just listening to you in that bus stop that morning. I have a gift a lot of people don't have. I can understand where you're coming from better then the person explaining it can. I can myself in people's shoes and know exactly how they're feeling. Unlike you; yea, I know what you're going through. I don't care though. Want to know why? Of course you do. Its cause, you made up these assumptions about me, you assumed right away that I was this person you thought you knew. You hurt yourself, I had no part in it. I'll get to why I haven't answered your calls in a second; be patient. I know you're probably sitting there reading this and the pain and feelings that I put there in your heart is coming back. But guess what? I don't care about that either cause you helped put it there.

---

Okay, this not calling me for a week bullshit. First of all, if you're mad at me; why wouldn't call me and tell me right then instead of waiting a whole month to come out with it? People put themselves in the past so much they don't realize that they're constantly hurting themselves in the process. Not calling me does nothing to me being that no one ever calls me. It also don't assume when someone doesn't call me that they're mad at me. Where ever you got that idea that not calling someone is showing you're mad from, you need to chalk it. Give it back to the dealer cause that shit they gave you was some false fake shit. If anything, I just thought you were busy. Oh, I'll get around to where I was and what I was doing, How I was and all that detailed shit in a minute. Calm down, you don't have nothing else to do but to read this. What you rushing for me to get to the point for? Anyway...

---

Being frank is what I'm doing now. Being hurt is what you are right now. Again, you hurt yourself. (Notice how I put all my responses to your bull in pieces? Thats so you don't get lost in shit YOU'VE said. Don't lose me). Anyway, you can kill all that noise; I mentioned all that shit above. No need to keep repeating myself. I will say this though; how does it feel to hurt yourself unintentionally? Can you actually sit there and say that all this pain you put yourself in; is all your doing? No cause you're too busy pointing the finger, but you didn't realize I held a mirror up right in front of you. Did you? No, you didn't. Your mind and heart is in two different places. Your mind is wondering and your heart is hurting. Well you've had almost a month to get over it. Still hurt?

---

Yea, I'm being blunt and some-what arrogant, but I have to do this to people who think they have me all summed up when its more to me than meets the eye. Not once have I lied to you though. If I bought it, its mine. Now I'm not even gone go further into that. I shouldn't have to break-down everything to you, do I?

---

Man, reading your jumbled sentences is hard but I can manage. Lets see where do I start with the next subject. Okay Okay, I got a question do you fall for love easily? How you love me in that short of time? Or are you just saying that cause you don't have no other way to describe your feelings? If thats how you express yourself, you need to reevaluate yourself. Seriously. I would get into why I think you don't/didn't love me but thats unnecessary, no need to add more fuel to the fire that you've started. Anyway, Me being trustworthy? Untrustworthy? Went? Weren't? Well, WHAT EVER you were trying to say it went through one side of my mind and out the other.

---

Its funny how you say that I broke up with you cause I didn't answer your calls. Reading this shows me how much you've hurt yourself with your own assumptions. I'm laughing at you cause you're so blind. Why you constantly feel that you should point the finger when you let so much time go by before you actually said something? I'm asking questions but I don't expect you to answer any of them so don't try; it'll just be more bad English I can't understand. Why waste time on things like that when its already irrelevant to me, right? Right.

---

You know its time to tell you where I was, how I've been, what I was doing, why and all that other detailed shit that you're so "anticipating" to know about. See, I got really ill within the time that I last saw you and now. If you knew me or took into consideration about the information you already knew about me. You would of had better assumptions to come up with instead of saying all this bullshit that you yourself don't even believe. Anyway, I got sick and my grandmother had my phone, I told her don't answer it just let it ring and people can leave a message. You know when I got the phone back. It was 50 messages. Not one from you and most of them were from my best-friend and my boyfriend. But then he wasn't my boyfriend then. Anyway, you so called "loved" me but you called me numerous times and you couldn't leave a message? No no, don't message me back saying that you did. I don't want to read it. (See how I dismissed that? Yea, I do that a lot, cause unlike you when I assume; I assume shit MOST typical humans do). Yea well I left Ohio for awhile to get away from things. My Uncle friend took me to Arizona, (its very pretty and quiet there by the way.) I didn't have a care in the world, and not once did I think of anyone back here in Ohio. That was the main reason for leaving, was to get my head away from here and it worked. I was in a wheelchair most of the time cause I couldn't walk without falling. For a minute I didn't even know who the hell I was and thought it was January. When my memory came back though, I cried cause I wish it hadn't. (I haven't cried in yrs.) So, basically I got ill and didn't want to be bothered. Got back here and my ex was in my room and I was surrounded by roses, stuffed animals, gifts all from him. That was the day I took him back. (Forgot all about you til you messaged me just now. Damn did I just say that?) Well back to the subject at hand, you assumed I hurt you. I could of been dead. But no no you rather make yourself the victim and pull the cards you've pulled. Which left you with a bad poker hand by the way.

---

"I would come by your house if I thought you really wanted to see me but if you dont want to speak I assume you definatly dont want to see me anymore." - Seriously; what in the fuckity fuck fuckery, were you talking about? I'm not even gone press that issue cause you lost me when I got to that part of the paragraph. At least proof-read shit before you send it to someone who have a 0-tolerance to trying to understand shit like what you just said. I'll bypass that shit and act like I didn't see it. But that shit was funny. I almost fell out my chair laughing. That sentence was so run-together I'm surprised my computer let me read it. (You spelled definately wrong by the way.)

---

You want what to work out? From the previous fucked up sentences it says I broke up with you. So How we gone let anything work out when we aren't together? WAIT A MIN! When in the hell did I become your girlfriend? Where was I at? We talked about it but not once did you realize if the feeling was mutual or not. I love how you keep hurting yourself. I haven't seen anything in this message that proved that I'm the one that hurt you.

---

I stepped on you? You're taller than me, how the fuck I step on you? (Sorry, I had to do it since that whole message you sent me been a joke anyway, mind as well add my own joke in there some where. LMAO!). Not once did I take advantage of your kindness. From my point of view, the only thing I considered kindness in this whole deal is only things decent people do. You didn't do anything special. You're a decent guy. I've met a kind guy, he's my best friend. Now thats a kind ass man. He goes out his way and knows me from head to toe and half the time I don't even know what he's up to until he hands me a gift or do something spectacular. But YOU?!?! You did normal decencies. Thats it. Don't give yourself so much credit where it isn't due. You've tried to make me see you as the victim when all I see you as is a person who had his head in the clouds and don't know have a clue to what half the shit he messaged with me means.

---

So let me be even more of an arrogant bastard and say this. I don't know you, you don't know me, I never seen you, you've never seen me, you don't have my number, I don't have yours (I really don't), I never talked to you before, you never talked to me, I never messaged you, you never messaged me, I don't miss you, you don't miss me. You don't exist. (See unlike you, I can move on cause I got a grip on reality at a young ass age.) Life has a lot of bullshit in it and people don't how to deal with it. Well I finally don't have that problem any more. I don't understand why you even messaged me. You should of just moved on. You do a lot of think and assuming so you mind as well think of a way to move the hell on. I don't even know what I moved on from but I did. I'm boggled that after that message though you added "I miss you." If I "hurt" you, why would you miss me? You look like a female in abusive relationship but don't want to leave cause she "loves" him. Yea, same difference.

---

You know, I didn't have to be so harsh in this message but when you sit and try to be Ms. Cleo and tell ME who I am and what I did then you need to be checked on by that. Normally I would of laughed at this message of yours and deleted it. But sense we share a few other things besides these messages, I felt it was my duty to finish doing something I never started. As you go through life, you gone remember what I've said and gone realize the shit was/is true and next time, you won't hurt yourself. You will find things about that person that THEY DID that HURT YOU. Not some damn sap story thats the total damn opposite. Which really is opposite cause I'm not hurt to the least. Well physically I am but emotionally and mentally; I'm not. I'm strong as fuck. My life and the shit I've gone through, been through, is going through is forcing me to be the person I am. I don't need to you trying to fix something that's not even broke. You're just a person that I shouldn't of gotten close to. I wish I never met you for the simple fact, I hurt you but I didn't, you hurt yourself which results in me hurting you. Yea, this message stung and I don't care. You provoked it, well I just choked it and killed it.

---

Well, now that you got all your questions answered. I shouldn't see a message from you period. It would be deleted, unread; whatever. It won't be acknowledged. I'm gone add you to my myspace though, just out of humor. Lol. Get your hopes up for a lost cause.

---

I sound like a total ass don't I? Well don't read too much into the font. I'm still the same ole me. But then again, I could be an ass and don't know it. You be the judge.

-Asilee-

----------------- Original Message -----------------

I dont get you. you say you want someone to love you as much as you give them love I come and give you as much love as a broken heart can but you kept pushing me away. I would want to take out but you wont want to go I try to get you things you want but you say you dont want them. I never took anything from nor really asked for anything. I give give give in relationships I thought you may be different but I guess not. then you lied to me about your hair which really did not matter to me I love you for you. I didn't call you for like a week after that to show you I was upset that you went being trust worthy about something I was mad nor did I want to break up with you. you broke up with me you stopped answer my phone calls and everything what am I to do. just be frank with me if you didn't want to see me anymore all you had to do was pick up the phone and say "This aint gone work out" and I'd have to accept it. but you left me in lembo I would come by your house if I thought you really wanted to see me but if you dont want to speak I assume you definatly dont want to see me anymore. I really wanted this to work I tired of beening stepped on in relationships and you was the first to take advantage of my kindness. message me back so we can talk.
I miss you

These glass works are imported from the U.S. each lampwork beads are handmade by lampworker, each beads are carefully planed on how to construct. then lampworker will slowly introduces glass rod or tubing into the flame to prevent cracking from thermal shock. The glass is heated until molten, wound around a specially-coated steel mandrel, forming the base bead and will add in different design or colour by melting different glass tube, therefore non of the beads are the same this is what make them unique, we call this the beauty of imperfection. We can claim that each beads are made with love and sweat.

aren't they stunning? hey, you girls know what? they are design to wear as bracelet too! definitely up to your call-- duo function accessories~!
Total length is 16.5cm, if you have bigger or small wrist do let us know we can made to adjust your requirement.

AHBC10-01
RM 19

AHBC10-02
RM 19

AHBC10-03
RM 19

AHBC10-04
RM19

AHBC10-05
RM19

this is how they look like when they are hanged.

* Each design has only one piece, no repeats can be made.

* these items are advised to post by either Poslaju or (registered) normal post.

as we told you, we hunt for the precious ones from everywhere in the world. here are some things we got from the hill. we admire their craftsmanship. each of them are hand crafted and molded no machine involve, its like going back to the stone age, made of pure silver. fascinated with the distinct vibes they have? so they are for you, one with unique taste.

AER10-01 | AER10-02
RM 26 each pair

AER10-03 | AER10-04
RM 27 each pair

ANL10-01 | ANL10-02
ANL10-01: RM 29
ANL10-02: RM 27

ANL10-03 | ANL10-04
RM 27 each

ANL10-05
RM 25 each

* stones are imported from Turkey
* only one piece available for each design

"Look at the stars, look how they shine for you". Ja. Stjärnorna, eller kanske snarare strålkastarna, lyste verkligen på Coldplay i år. Viva La Vida or Death And All His Friends var ett av årets mest eftertraktade album och när singlarna Violet Hill och Viva La Vida släpptes trodde nog de flesta att Coldplay återigen levererat en kanonplatta som skulle bli en klassiker på scenen. Oj vad fel vi hade.

Skivan rullar igång med en introlåt som förvisso är helt okej men känns onödig, den tar bara upp plats på den blott tio låtar långa skivan, hidden track borträknat och de oförklarliga "dubbellåtarna" översedda. Att bandet valt att skivan ska hålla sig till ett "tema" är uppenbart, men ännu mer uppenbart är att det försämrar skivan avsevärt. Ärligt talat, hade det inte varit bättre att välja 10-12 riktigt bra låtar istället för att fylla ut skivan med fillers för temats skull? Nog finns det låtar på skivan som verkligen gick mig till hjärtat men de är alldeles för få, och låtarna som bara passerade genom mig känns så intetsägande och ogenomtänkta så det känns nästan bisarrt. Framförallt med tanke på hur professionella Coldplay alltid har varit och de perfektionister som de hävdar sig vara.

Allt som allt så var det på sin höjd fattiga 5 låtar som jag tyckte höll måttet. En stor besvikelse, då jag är en riktigt idog Coldplay-lyssnare. Det här måste vara årets flopp kvalitetsmässigt, kanske mest på grund av den förväntan jag hade på albumet.

Betyg 5/10. Med ett bättre val av låtar och utelämnandet av fillers hade skivan utan tvekan kunnat få det dubbla.